shithub: maude_mold

ref: cde05f4187aed1c77b8efb57ee5dabe8d5d5106d
dir: /troff/003.ms/

View raw version
\" This master file produces text suitable for a 6"x9" paperback.
.ds CH \" turn off page numbering (top)
.B
.nr HM 1i \" header margin
.nr FM 1i \" footer margin
.nr LL 4.25i \" line length
.pl 9i \" page length
.po .87i \" page offset (from left)
.nr PS 8 \" font point size
\" .kern \" pairwise kerning (groff only)
.hy 14 \" automatic hyphenation
\" .nr VS 24 \" double space
.fp 1 R GA	\" URW Garamond
.fp 2 I GI
.fp 3 B GM
.fp 4 BI GMI
.fp 5 CW H	\" Helvetica
.LP
\&
.nr % 13 \ " start with this page number
.ds CF [%] \" first numbered page (bottom)
.ps 10
.ce
.B
LOW RED MOON
\&
.ps 8
tags: 1961, mars2, fng, jerrymander_mold, spiro_mold, tab1
.R
.PP
.ps 10
9 August.
.PP
.ps 10
So, in the middle of his blowjob, he looks up, and expects to see, like, a bunch of dead grey rock and shit, right?
.PP
.ps 10
Uh\-uh.  Not what he expected, right?  
.PP
.ps 10
He near to smashed every single switch on his control board when he saw it.  There, down in a rather \fIlarge\fR crater on the dark side of the moon, was the biggest resort hotel he had ever \fIseen.\fR  Actually, it looked to him like there was a whole little \fItown\fR down there, right?  So he descended, in order to get a closer look at whatever the fuck was going on.
.PP
.ps 10
He barely pulled away in time to avoid disintegration via deflector shield.  Coming by on another, more liberally distanced pass, his sensors informed him that there was what appeared to be a giant plexi\-plastic bubble stretched taut over the city.  A sort of glass ceiling, if you will.
.PP
.ps 10
So, what does he do?  Why, he blasts a hole in it, of course.
.PP
.ps 10
Down on the ground, a little boy had let his dog out to see a man about a horse.  They were standing there in his backyard, looking up at the night sky, when they notice this guy's serpent come crashing through the bubble.
.PP
.ps 10
Well, the serpent's shields were apparently no match for the bubble's natural bio\-genic feedback, and so, in addition to opening a hole, he was sent hurtling onto the dead satellite's surface.  The serpent touched down near that little boy's yard.  The child raced over, but his dog hadn't finished pissing yet, see? All over his Asics.
.PP
.ps 10
The boy and his dog soon found the charred remains of this guy and his mistress, right?  So, he runs home, tells Mom and Dad, and his folks, first thing, get a hold of the press.
.PP
.ps 10
Next day.  The headline reads:
.PP
.ps 10
ALIENS CRASH LAND ON EARTH.
.PP
.ps 10
Now.  Where's my cocaine?
.PP
.ps 10
FNG looked around. TAB1 was still staring straight up, sans visor, peering through the pink clouds at some distant, though persistently incoming pink object. No one had brought any cocaine.
.PP
.ps 10
"Sorry, but no one brought any cocaine," FNG said.
.PP
.ps 10
"I spoke but rhetorically," Jerrymander sighed. He leaned down
.bp
and snorted the ground, his two nostrils presently caked with sand.
.PP
.ps 10
About a mile downrange, Spiro Mold had set out with his dog.